September 26, 2007 9:03 AM

For Tonight's Debate

For those of you considering watching the debate tonight, here's some advice from Drinking Liberally that may make it go down a little more easily... (And no, you don't have to drink alcohol -- the game is fun with coffee, soda, water, juice or chocolate milkshakes.)

Drinking Liberally Shot of Truth: Dem Debate Drinking Game

As no less an authority than Chris Bowers has admitted in the past, sometimes the endless series of Democratic debates is just easier to watch with a drink in hand...and as this picture of Bill Richardson from our National Conference confirms (photo by David Alpert), it can also make it easier to be a candidate. In this spirit, Drinking Liberally has organized several Debate Watch parties this season, with drinking games included for those of us who can't hear another candidate utter another cliche without a little assistance from the sauce. Want to hold a Debate Watch drinking game with some fellow political junkies in the comfort of your own hometown bar, and need the rules? Thought you'd never ask. Drink liberally and, as always, drink responsibly.

Small Sip If...
a candidate says...
-  "Healthcare for all Americans"
-  "Business as usual in Washington"
-  "That's a great question..."
-  "This President..."
-  "The bloggers"
-  "Bush"
-  "Cheney"
-  "You're wrong"
-  "Hope" (big gulp if it's not Barack Obama)
-  "Children living in poverty" (big sip if it's not John Edwards)
-  something about being latino (big gulp if not Bill Richardson)
-  "I was the Senator from New York on 9-11." (big gulp if not Hillary Clinton)
-  something about Abraham Lincoln
or if...
-  a candidate mentions Ahmedinejad (big gulp if correctly pronounced)
-  John Edwards says "I was wrong."
-  Obama mentions facts or figures (big gulp if  he mentions both.)
-  Joe Biden tells the person asking question, "I like you."
-  Mike Gravel yells.

More rules below -- keep reading for full Drinking Game guidelines

Big Gulp If...
a candidate says...
-  "Law and order"
-  "Torture"
-  "Leave all options on the table"
-  "I feel your pain."
-  "Read my lips."
-  "Net neutrality"
-  something about JFK
or if...
-  They mention Republican candidates being afraid of black people
-  They tell a joke that 's actually funny
-  Joe Biden yells.
-  Mike Gravel asks other candidates to get off  his lawn.
-  Dennis Kucinich gets visibly upset at not being invited to Harkin Steak Fry

Chug If...
a candidate says...
-  "I agree with President Bush on this."
-  "Oil"
-  "Cindy Sheehan"
-  "Count every vote"
-  "You're lying" to another candidate.
-  Something about FDR.
or if...
-  They mention Bill O'Reilly being afraid of black people
-  Anyone asks Chris Dodd a question.
-  Candidate attempt to connect to young people through pop culture reference fails.
-  Candidate gratuitously bashes MoveOn
-  John Edwards yells.
-  a candidate admits they really want to see Balls of Fury
-  Mike Gravel just stares into camera.
-  a candidate takes a wide stance
-  Bill Richardson mentions being the only candidate to attend Drinking Liberally

Celebratory Toast If...
a candidate says...
-  "It's time to start bringing the troops home."
-  "Impeachment"
-  "That's a dumb question."
-  "And that's why I'm proud to be a Liberal"
-  anything about the Jena 6
or if...
-  any candidate defends MoveOn
-  Clinton apologizes for Iraq.
-  Candidate attempt to connect to young people through pop culture reference, succeeds
-  Al Gore magically descends from the ceiling with a blaze of trumpets.
-  Someone asks a legitimately insightful question you had not previously considered.  (finish your drink if it's answered in a perceptive, thoughtful fashion.)

Finish Your Drink If...
a candidate say...
-  "Don't mess with Texas."
-  Something about Franklin Pierce.
or if...
-  Someone leaves race onstage.
-  Anyone makes a Mormon joke
-  Barack Obama yells
-  Joe Biden admits that not even he knows why he's running for President.